There’s nothing quite like the ache of watching someone you love suffer and not knowing how to help. You feel the pull to fix it, to say the right thing, to show up perfectly. But more often than not, you’re left feeling unsure, maybe even a little helpless.
At , we sit with people in that very place all the time—individuals who desperately want to support their partner, their teenager, their friend—but are afraid of making it worse. If that’s you, take a deep breath. You’re not alone. And you don’t have to do it perfectly to be helpful.
Mental Health Struggles Are More Common Than You Think
Let’s normalize something right off the bat: mental health challenges are a part of being human. Roughly one in four adults in the U.S. live with a mental health condition, and nearly half of us will face one at some point in our lifetime. That’s not fringe. That’s all of us.
But here’s the kicker—so many people still feel like they have to hide their pain. The silence around mental health doesn’t protect anyone. It isolates us. That’s why starting conversations like this matters.
As Dr. Robert Chen reminds us, “When someone feels they must hide their struggles, the isolation often intensifies their suffering. Creating safe spaces for honest conversation is one of the most powerful forms of support we can offer.”
Mental Health Doesn’t Always Look How You Expect
We’ve learned something essential through years of therapy work—mental health issues don’t always look like what you’d expect. Sometimes they show up as anger, avoidance, a messy room, skipped meals, or overachievement. Sometimes it looks like your child pulling away or your spouse becoming short and irritable.
What’s often underneath those surface behaviors are deeper stories—old wounds, identity struggles, grief that hasn’t found words yet.
As I often say in sessions, “It’s not just about what’s happening now—it’s about what this moment is awakening in us.”
Whether it’s the transition into adulthood, the loss of a job, or the loneliness of marriage struggles, life has a way of uncovering what’s unresolved. And that’s not something you can fix for someone else. But you can be a steady presence as they walk through it.
What Support Really Looks Like
Support isn’t about solving someone’s problems. It’s about showing up in a way that reminds them they’re not alone. It’s about saying:
- “I notice you haven’t been yourself lately. What’s going on?”
- “I care about you, and I’m here to talk if and when you’re ready.”
- “This seems heavy. I wonder if it’d help to talk with someone professionally.”
It’s also about knowing your own limits. You can’t pour from an empty cup. You can love someone fiercely and still say, “I can’t be your only lifeline.” That’s not selfish. That’s wisdom.
We often remind families in therapy: you are a bridge—not the destination. Your job isn’t to rescue. It’s to stay close enough to walk beside them,
As Dr. Michael Torres puts it, “The CHIME framework—Connectedness, Hope, Identity, Meaning, and Empowerment—reminds us that effective support focuses on building strengths rather than just addressing problems.”
Signs Someone May Need Support
Sometimes it’s hard to tell when a loved one is struggling. But here are a few things to pay attention to:
- Withdrawing from people or activities they usually enjoy
- Harsh self-talk or constant comparison
- A drop in personal hygiene or energy
- Changes in eating or sleep patterns
- Avoiding responsibilities or becoming overwhelmed by small tasks
- A general feeling of walking on eggshells around them
These shifts aren’t random—they’re signals. And rather than judging or ignoring them, our role is to get curious. Kind curiosity is one of the most powerful gifts you can offer.
Boundaries Are Part of Love
This one’s big. Real support includes knowing where your role ends. Boundaries don’t make you cold or distant. They help you love well and sustainably.
I tell clients all the time: “You’re not being called to carry someone else’s backpack. You’re being asked to walk with them while they carry their own.”
Here are a few phrases that honor both your compassion and your capacity:
- “I care deeply about you. I’m also noticing this is starting to weigh heavily on me.”
- “I’ll walk with you through this, but I’m not your therapist. Let’s find someone who can support you in that way.”
- “I need to take care of myself, too, so I can keep showing up.”
The goal isn’t perfection. It’s presence. The kind that honors both their journey and your own.
As Dr. Brené Brown says, “When we rush to fix others’ pain, we often rob them of the opportunity to develop resilience and self-efficacy—qualities that are essential for long-term mental health.”
We’re Here to Walk With You
At Rooted Therapies, we specialize in , somatic therapy, marriage counseling, and couples therapy that’s truly rooted in understanding the whole person. Whether you’re searching for a therapist near you in North Port, FL, or exploring how to support a loved one with compassion and boundaries, we’re here to help.
offer care that goes beyond talk—integrating body-based practices, trauma-informed tools, and relationship healing to meet people right where they are.
Because healing happens when support is rooted in connection, safety, and truth.
Ready to take the next step?
, browse our podcast, or contact a Rooted Therapies counselor today.
References
American Psychiatric Association. (2023). What is mental illness? Retrieved from https://www.psychiatry.org/patients-families/what-is-mental-illness
Brown, B. (2021). Atlas of the Heart: Mapping meaningful connection and the language of human experience. Random House.
Chen, R. (2022). Supporting Loved Ones Through Crisis: A guide for families. Mental Health Press.
National Alliance on Mental Illness. (2023). Mental health by the numbers. Retrieved from https://www.nami.org/mhstats
Torres, M. (2023). The CHIME Framework: Evidence-based approaches to mental health recovery. Journal of Recovery Research, 12(2), 156-170.